Everyday Commitments

First Unitarian Universalist Church of Berks County
Everyday Commitments
Rev. Sandra Fees
May 4, 2008
Page 1 of 5
© 2008, Rev. Sandra Fees
Excerpts may be quoted with attribution.
Our lives are filled with commitments. Some of our commitments - to
marriage, children, and church – constitute long-term promises, often
lasting a lifetime. Others have a shorter timeframe, such as serving on a
committee or a summer job.
Still other commitments, like driving a friend to an appointment, may
last only a day or an hour. Of course some we thought would be enduring may come to an end.
And others we thought would be brief become rooted in our everyday existence and abide with
us.
These various commitments taken together express something of our lives. They emerge from
the purpose and meaning of our days, from who we are, and the values we hold dear. Rather than
a random assortment of obligations, responsibilities, and dates on calendars, they present a
snapshot of what drives our existence.
What we commit to and what we make time for indicate something of our actual lived priorities,
our ultimate concern. You see, a commitment is not an idea alone. It is not only a way of
thinking. It is more importantly a way of being. That’s what makes it so daunting, so compelling,
so powerful – and so absolutely essential.
And there’s more. The commitments we do make not only express who we are but also help to
create the people we are becoming. Twentieth century theologian and Unitarian minister James
Luther Adams says, “We become what we love.”
The implication seems clear. We commit to the things we love, or we risk losing them. Given
what I observe in our culture as a resistance and even avoidance of basic commitments, things
like RSVPs, telling the truth, being on time, I sometimes find myself wondering and worrying
about what it is we do love and what we are thus in danger of becoming.
When we commit to and strive toward a life of faith, to the intimate bonds of partnership, family,
and friendship, to a generous and grateful approach to living, and to concern for the world we are
going to be living out of a spirit of abundance, courage, honesty, and kindness. When we are
unwilling to do so, we wander lonely in the wilderness.
That’s why James Luther Adams placed commitment at the center of theology, ethics, and
religion. He said, “The first characteristic of human collective existence is commitment, that is,
making an agreement, a promise. Promising is a characteristic feature of meaningful human
existence” (The Essential James Luther Adams). It is a decision of the heart to create a bond of
trust and care with people and groups.
The theologian Martin Buber describes humans as “promise-making, promise-breaking, and
promise-remaking creatures.” We create and re-create our lives out of the promises we make.
Like Adams, Buber recognizes the making of promises as essential to human nature.
Everyday Commitments (cont’d.)
Rev. Sandra Fees
Page 2 of 5
© 2008, Rev. Sandra Fees
Excerpts may be quoted with attribution.
A covenant is one kind of promise we make. And it is a kind of commitment I want to focus on
this morning because I believe it has a bearing on all the other promises we make. A covenant is
a sacred promise, a specifically religious commitment. This concept is found in the Old
Testament. There the promises between God and individuals, between God and groups of people,
establish agreements about how people are to be with one another and with God.
Our religion follows in the tradition of the covenant. We are a covenantal people. Our covenantal
tradition exists in contrast to creedal ones. What connects us as Unitarian Univeralists is our
affirmation and agreement to our principles and sources and to a certain way of being together –
to being in right relationship. According to a report of the UUA Commission on Appraisal
written in 2005:
In a creedal faith, individuals are tied together by one set of beliefs; in a covenantal faith,
they are bound by faithfulness to vows. As covenanters, we contend that we can better
shape and stretch the Unitarian Universalist faith within the caring critique and embrace
of community.
A covenant has a contractual aspect to it. But it is the relational piece that gives it spiritual
grounding. That is its source of deep and profound meaning and power. Adams says, “One
maintains responsibility for the collective, not … because it is the law, but because of love. The
responsibility is motivated by affection.” What we covenant with one another is what we
promise to do on behalf of the relationship. It is based in trust and affection (Essential JLA). We
promise each other in love.
We freely enter into mutual agreements. By doing so, we move boldly forward as companions on
the spiritual journey. We empower one another through the sacred bonds of mutual trust and
support. What an incredible gift it is to hold each other in love and care by these voluntary vows.
Such promises are fulfilled only in communal life. They require companions and institutional
allegiance. They remind us that we are connected and beholden to others in our chosen faith.
When we break our covenant with one another, it is a breach of faithfulness, a violation of the
affection upon which the promise was grounded in the first place. It hurts because it is a violation
of our trust.
In his description, Buber wisely said that we humans are promise-breaking as well as promisemaking
creatures. This too is a reality of our lives in community, in relationship. Promises will
be broken. We do not always live up to our agreements and understandings about how we are to
be together. When we fail to keep our vows, we need to call each other back into our covenant,
back into loving relationship.
If we don’t, then we will continue to be out of right relationship. We’ll hold grudges and gossip
about each other. We’ll complain and carry resentments and disappointments. This surely is not
the life of faith any of seeks.
Everyday Commitments (cont’d.)
Rev. Sandra Fees
Page 3 of 5
© 2008, Rev. Sandra Fees
Excerpts may be quoted with attribution.
Some congregations read a covenant such as the one we read by Griswold Williams every
Sunday as a community to remind each other of the essential nature of the relationship. Sharing a
spoken covenant can be a way to affirm and re-make the covenant on a regular basis.
So what are the promises we make to each other as a religious community? What are our
commitments?
We have a commitment to each other as members of this faith and this church. Some of the
promises we make to each other as members of this religious community were shared in our
member ceremony this morning.
We had a membership class a few weeks ago. As part of it, I talked about the expectations and
responsibilities of members. Sadly there was a time in the history of our churches when we were
embarrassed to talk about this and therefore it often seemed little was expected of our members.
My experience with new members is that they are grateful to know explicitly what is expected of
them.
Growing dynamic churches today expect a lot of their members. We expect a lot of each other.
As it turns out, when we expect more of each other, we so often rise to the occasion.
When people believe the best in us, when they expect us to do well, to behave well, to be
generous, to serve, to be intentional about the spiritual life, then we find ourselves reaching to do
our very best, and even sometimes surprising ourselves by what we can do. We have a sense of
confidence and purpose, a sense that we matter and that our efforts here are an integral part of
the fabric of community and life.
Our growing expectations of ourselves reflect our growing health, strength, and spiritual maturity
as a church and our increased sense of self-esteem as a religious community that can and does
fulfill its mission. Promises that are fulfilled build trust, love, and self-esteem.
That is happening because as part of our relationship, we agree to give time, talent, and money to
this church. The covenant between us can not be as strong as possible without all three of these
by every one of us.
As more and more of us give generously and willingly of our spiritual gifts, our time, and our
money, this church becomes more and more alive with possibilities and so do each of us. We are
increasingly becoming a church that is transforming hearts and minds and spirits. We are
fulfilling our mission in the world – as individuals and collectively. Our other commitments are
not so different. If we tend to them, if we devote ourselves to them, they nourish us and the
world.
As part of our covenant as members, we commit to telling other people about the church – to
letting our little light shine in public. Those who are seeking this life-saving, life-transforming
faith need to be introduced to it – by each and every one of us.
Everyday Commitments (cont’d.)
Rev. Sandra Fees
Page 4 of 5
© 2008, Rev. Sandra Fees
Excerpts may be quoted with attribution.
I do this by participating in vigils and interfaith activities. Yesterday I offered a prayer as part of
a vigil during a peace walk and also after that at the peace festival. I reconnected with several
people in the community and connected for the first time with several ministers.
I also made a contact with someone in the Native American tradition who may be able to offer a
program for us sometime in the future, and with someone who works in mental health and may
be able to give us assistance as we explore this area as part of our social justice work.
Members who participated in yesterday’s activities sported their Unitarian Universalist t-shirts
and staffed a table at the festival. I’m sure they also made connections. All this brings visibility
to our faith and our church – and what we stand for.
Our covenant includes the call to be socially responsible. This means promoting justice and
mercy. According to the Old Testament prophets, a covenant required concern for “the weak and
the deprived” (JLA). Our faith has a history of such commitment, to feeding the hungry, to
striving toward full participation by those without a voice, and to working to free people from
oppression and fear.
There is one more specific covenant I want to mention. It is the historic covenant in our churches
between minister and congregation. This covenant involves what we refer to as the free pulpit
and the free pew. The congregation entrusts the pew to the called minister who is given the
freedom to speak her truth without censure.
The congregation has the right to dismiss the minister from the ministry. But as long as the
minister is in relationship with the congregation, the minister is the spiritual leader who has
freedom of the pulpit, freedom as the congregation’s spiritual leader.
Members of the congregation likewise have the freedom to disagree with the minister about what
she says from the pulpit. The ability to be engaged in lively conversation about the sermon topic
and service is viewed as a positive sign of congregational strength and vibrancy. The minister
and congregation share in a sacred bond founded on trust, love, and truth.
The covenant we read together captures the core commitments of this church and I think also of
our everyday lives. We covenant to love, truth, and service. We promise to dwell together in
peace. We promise to seek knowledge in freedom. We promise to serve human needs.
These are our everyday commitments. They are not only for the moment we signed the
membership book or took our marriage vows, but they are made and kept every day of our lives.
These are promises we make and re-make every day in order to grow into harmony with the
divine and each other.
I ask you, each of you, to consider the promises you make? What promises do you make to your
spiritual companions and to this church? What promises have been made to you? I encourage
you to be generous in your promise-making and your promise re-making. By doing so, may we
become what we love.
Everyday Commitments (cont’d.)
Rev. Sandra Fees
Page 5 of 5
© 2008, Rev. Sandra Fees
Excerpts may be quoted with attribution.
May it be so. Amen.